The explanation I owe [Warning: Sensitive Content]

[ The following was posted as a note on my facebook profile on Monday night, sorry I forgot to post a copy here as well. ]
Whether you missed the event, heard the story, were there, or have no idea what’s going on, there’s some stuff that needs to be put out in the open. I’m [...]

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Day 7

One week ago today, something inside snapped. I’ve tried to articulate what’s going on in my head and in my heart, and the best I can come up with is “I’m thinking too hard,” or more accurately, “I don’t know.” I don’t have names for the feelings or the emotions, or even the thought processes. [...]

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My mask is crumbling…

Get up at 6 am, drive Jess to work.
Gotta smile, even though I’m dead tired.

Grab breakfast, drive home and eat. Play several games of Tetris to distract yourself, wonder what today will hold. Pack up books, leave for class. Try to listen to happy music on the way there, shiver in the cold Iowa autumn. [...]

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Whew… Road trip tomorrow!

The packing is almost done, the boxes are all over my living room, my brain is running a bazillion miles an hour 24/7, I’m nervous and excited and ready and not ready, all at the same time. Tomorrow, I take off on a 6 hour drive to Ames, Iowa, to start my sophomore year as [...]

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Saturday night musings…

Again, I have no idea where I’m going with this, so I might as well just start rambling. It’s been a pretty good weekend: almost exclusively lovely, in fact. I spent a bit more than I day driving to Iowa with my (non-biological) big Brother Ryan, helping him move stuff into storage in his new [...]

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[ Untitled ]

So, I don’t really know where I’m going with this. I haven’t blogged in far too long, probably because I can’t seem to get my thoughts in order for long enough to write something of interest. Also, a good chunk of these summer weeks have been wonderful — my depression and BPD were stable, I [...]

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Phew. Am back.

It’s been a while, and I do sincerely apologize. Life has thrown me a lot of curve balls in the past few weeks, and I’m still trying to figure everything out, which should not surprise you… Blehh. Here goes.
Last night, I arrived back on campus after a week of spring break. My “twin” Jess and [...]

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Sifting through piles and piles of thoughts…

It’s already 12 minutes into Thursday, and for some odd reason, it still feels like a Monday to me — maybe a generous Tuesday, tops. Couldn’t tell ya why, maybe I’m just losing it…
As far as weeks go, this one has been decent, but bumpy. I haven’t fallen asleep in any classes, the weather’s looking [...]

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Thoughts from the middle of the week

**Note: In attempt to cheer up the demeanor of this blog, I’ve added an “if you need a laugh” page, where I posted a bunch of YouTube videos that I find quite humorous. Let me know if there are others I should add! The quotes page is also pretty amusing, especially if you’ve been quoted… [...]

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More ramblings…

I’m still out of it. I took the step off the cliff, and am still in the middle of the stomach-churning sensation of falling. I don’t know when I’ll hit the bottom, where I’ll land, or how long the pain will last. I’m struggling to see hope.
After my confession that I was afraid I was [...]

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